The Best Valentine’s Day Party Ever – Contest Entry

Valentiny Writing Contest 2018

Contest Rules:

  1. A character must be hopeful
  2. 214 words max, title not included
  3. Appropriate for ages 12 and under
  4. No illustration notes

See other stories at Susanna Hill’s Valentiny post.

Now, for my story in exactly 213 words.

 

The Best Valentine’s Day Party Ever

by Jilanne Hoffmann

Sal’s a maker. Cal’s a baker. Val’s an advisor. Corndog’s—a dog. Together, they hope to host the best Valentine’s Day party ever!

But how to get party supplies into their treehouse?  

Val advises climbing, one hand for the ladder, one for treats.

Cal goes first, carrying cupcakes.

“I’m slipping!” cries Cal.

“Ewwww!” says Sal. “We’re covered in—mmmm, yum!”

Corndog licks them up one side and down the other.

Next, Val advises tossing up the bag of candy hearts.

Cal throws, then cries “Too low!” as it bursts against the tree.

Corndog snarfles up hearts.

Val advises throwing higher.

“I’ll build a catapult!” says Sal.

While Sal builds, Cal bakes more cupcakes. Val advises they work faster. Corndog scratches.

Quickly, they bundle treats and decorations into the catapult’s scoop.

“I advise—”

T-w-anggggg!

“You NOT to pull it back that far.”

The bundle flies up—

And over the fence. The neighbor’s dog, Crunch, gobbles their cupcakes and shreds their decorations.

The trio watch through the fence in silence. Corndog whines.

“We’re here!” call their friends.

“Into the treehouse, everyone,” advises Val. “Cal, get more cupcakes. Sal, launch them at us. We’ll catch them!”

T-w-anggg!

“Yum!”

When the fog of frosting clears, no one wants to leave. Like all of the best parties.

Burp!

57 thoughts on “The Best Valentine’s Day Party Ever – Contest Entry

    • Jilanne Hoffmann says:

      Yay! The chickens appreciate your scribbles. And I appreciate a fellow punster. You win the find the metaphor in the story prize! Not that I have any physical prizes to hand out, mind you. So all I can give is my deepest appreciation and thanks for your most insightful comment! Cheers!

    • Jilanne Hoffmann says:

      Thanks, Robyn! I’m pleased that those names worked for you! And yes, everyone ended up having a great Valentine’s Day. I was tempted to call Val a consultant, just for kicks, but decided against it, LOL. Thanks for stopping by!

    • Jilanne Hoffmann says:

      Thank you, Charlotte! Those dogs kinda took over, didn’t they? As they often do. If this were illustrated, you’d see all kinds of dog cupcake scarfing action at the end, LOL. Thanks for stopping by!

  1. hilarymb says:

    Hi Jilanne – such a fun post … I can see the kids and the dog, then dogs darting everywhere just to get more … til all had tummy aches! Still their tree house was a fun place to hold cupcake court … cheers Hilary

  2. Delfina Salimbene says:

    Hahaha! Loved your opening and laughed so hard at “Corndog’s—a dog.” These kids know how to throw a party. Forget dunking for apples. Cupcake launching is the next big thing! Best of luck, Jilanne!

  3. karianngonzalez says:

    What creative names you’ve come up with here! I love the story and vibrant language. Wishing you the best of luck, feel free to catapult a cupcake my way any day!

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